And his name shall be..........

ASHER HOUSTON COLE

Little bean has officially (at least "officially" in the Cole household) been re-named. "Asher" is straight from the Old Testament and it means "happy/blessed." I love that meaning! the name is great, but the meaning just seals the deal for me. "Houston" comes from our dear Grandpa Cole. Grandpa Cole is an amazing man of God. His devotion to all things important is beyond striking. It is an honor to Ryan and I to be able to use "Houston" as Asher's middle name.

Ok, now that we got that fun stuff out there, I really feel like I need to vent. I really try not to be the verbage police when it come to adoption related terminology. If some one asks me if Anna and Gideon are my "real kids" I will politely reply "yes" or "yes, we adopted them." Sometimes I get a little irked when I am asked if I am their "real" mom, but not everyone has been in the adoption world for years like I have. Most people don't know the "proper" way to say things. For whatever reason, I have not ever got on my soapbox about the way people phrase things. For the most part, the people I know are good, loving people, and would be sad if they knew they said something offensive (even if it were just slight). I just be sure that I use the proper terms (like birthmom instead of "real" mom) and I think most people, in a non offensive way, get the picture. Also, to be truthful, I haven't had any really idiotic things said, until this morning.......

So, we were at Logan's soccer game this morning (tie 3-3) and my mom was talking to a lady that I will not name. They were counting and comparing grandchildren and all I heard from this lady (who happens to have been a personal friend for years) "well, they don't count, she bought those kids." I only half heard it because I was watching the game. When, then as clear as day, she says it again, "well, those two don't count because she bought them." I could tell my mom was uncomfortable and she chimed back "well I love those two just as much as the rest, they are really no different." The woman then was like, "well, sure, yeah, I know....." I guess maybe backtracking a bit?? My mom kind of yelled up to me (a couple seats up), "are you hearing this?" I just said "I am trying to ignore it."

So, first off this lady is just ignorant. Secondly, I am mad at myself. As I sit here after I have been removed from the situation, I am completely upset with myself that I didn't say more to her. To me, she carried her comments beyond being just uneducated, she was rude. For goodness sakes, Anna and Gideon were sitting right beside me. I know they had no clue the woman was even talking, let alone understanding the content of what she was saying, but still, they are getting close. I will never be able to shelter my kids from every ill thing that is said about them. I wouldn't want to. I just hope that the next time someone decides demean one of my kids that I can find a way to lovingly educate them and let them know that it is unacceptable.

Julie